I remember my first job like it was yesterday. My working
girl job was mild to say the least. I was a car hop at the beloved fast food
chain Sonic Drive Inn. Not the most glamorous job but not bad for my first. As
a high-schooler, I made bank! Not only did I make above minimum wage but I also
made tips every night. Those would range from $50 to $100 a night. Because I did
make so much, I was cut off! From that point on I had to pay for everything. When
I bought something, it was a big deal. I worked hard to pay for what I got so
you best believe I was careful with who I let hold, touch, or borrow my
possessions. It instilled a great pride in me.
Ladies if we work so hard for our possessions such as clothes,
our car, or even hair, can you feel me, why shouldn’t we take that much pride with our hearts? We can have a great pride about of heart while we are in the
dating game. Our heart is a sacred place and our most precious possession. In fact, if you
were to ask a child where Jesus lives, their reply, “in my heart.” If that is
the case, why would we share such a sacred place with any ole male that
comes along. This should not be. It is a place reserved for Jesus.
Matthew 7:6 “Do
not give what is holy to the dogs; nor cast your pearls before swine, lest
they trample them under their feet, and turn and tear you in pieces. I
know some women scorn are thinking this verse directly relates to men. Sorry
think again. For the sake of conversation this can insinuate that we should
not give something so precious, our hearts, to someone not deserving of it and who doesn't know how to handle it. As we understand
not only who we are but Whose we are, we will value it so much more. We shouldn’t treat it like something that
anyone has easy access to. Don't let it be taken for granted.
Proverbs 4:23 says Guard your heart with all diligence. This
sounds more like a command than just a suggestion. Let's break down the verse a bit. To guard actually means to keep secret, be blockaded, guard from dangers,
preserve. This is the attitude we need to keep about our hearts. It further
goes on to say that your heart is your escape from death and your source of
life. We can escape the lack of peace due to dating heart breaks if we follow that simple command. Our heart is our life source.
However, what we see is single well intention young women
who are lonely, give their hearts away to anyone who gives them the time of day.
If we aren’t careful, a simple “Hello” to an unguarded heart can lead to
dangerous waters. With time, the heart becomes unprotected and in danger. Next
thing you know, after long serious conversations and discussion of marriage, you
are all in!
Then one day out of nowhere he tells you that he just isn’t
in love with you anymore or he has met someone else. What? You guys talked about
your future plans together.From things like, where you would get married, where you would settle
down, how many kids you would have, dog or cat, and how you would navigate
watching Empire (Yep that’s my show) or the basketball games. In tears and
devastated, you are left to pick up the pieces. How did you get here?
Well my friend, you were loose with your heart and
unfortunately there can be repercussion for that. Thank God that He can redeem
all situations. If you allow it, He can mend a broken heart. Don’t wallow in
your mistakes. Ask God to forgive your carelessness with your heart. Trust that
He heals and be careful next time. No condemnation. Move forward.
In my opinion, we are allowed to have pride involving our
hearts. As we build our confidence, we
understand that we have the right to hold on to it more tightly. We are daughters of the Most High
King. You’re royalty.Think of your heart like the crown jewels. The jewels are locked away other than special occasions. Keep your heart on lock down. The crown jewels aren't easy to access and neither should your heart be. At this point, the only person that has earned access to the crown jewel of the heart is Jesus. With his death and resurrection He has obtained it. Make men earn your heart.
Let me clarify this a bit. I don’t mean playing games with
him or guarding your heart so tightly that it makes it impossible to really
know you. Be wise with how vulnerable you allow yourself to get but don’t
lay it all out there either ladies. Stay
a little mysterious. Men are meant to pursue and if your heart is clear as glass they
have no chase. Be balanced. Wait to let your crazy out! Slowly let it seep out!
Just kidding, but really…
What I mean about earning your heart is allowing time for him to show
himself worthy. Look at his character. The things that he does or says and
integrity issues are the things that indicates whether or not he can begin to gain access to your heart. Now is he always going to get it right? NO! We all mess up so give him mercy.
I know all this can be confusing but don’t neglect the fact that
you know the Omniscient- all knowing God. Ask Him about the situation. If we do
it in our own understanding, we will get it wrong every time. James 1:5 says if any of you lacks wisdom, ask of God. Through
discernment He will tell you what to do and when to act.
One final thought. YOUR HEART IS ON RESERVE UNTIL YOU GET MARRIED!!! No
ifs, ands, or buts! The altar is the only time that you are allowed to give your heart away
no matter how committed of a relationship you are in, The day
that you say “I Do” and enter into that covenant it is okay to fully commit your heart to your spouse. By this time hopefully he has proven himself to have character like Jesus. Ar this time you should feel safe to let your barricades down. Until then your heart is on look
down. Got it!
#thatsinglelifethough
Bekah out!
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